A Mexican witch doctor cleanse

So, while we were in Oaxaca, Dinh thought it would be a cool idea to find a curandera, aka: a witch doctor. I was slightly annoyed as he asked almost everyone we ran into if they knew of a curandera. It seemed to be some type of secret business because the locals weren't quick to give out the info on the lady .
It wasn't until the second day of witch hunting that we caught a scent on the trail. Dinh and I were in a local market snooping around. We ate some crickets. True story . We also ate some chocolate and prunes to wash them down. Because they were salty .
We stumbled upon a guy selling incense, charms and what-nots. He looked like the kind of guy that would know where a witch doctor was. We asked, and he came through. He motioned for us to follow him through the mumble jumble maze of the market. He stopped at a little shop that looked part Halloween store, part herbal shop. I got a little spooked out because the lighting was low and there were skull candy faces and jugs of strange liquids laying around. Little shop of horrors. 

Suddenly , in between the herbs pops out a 32 year-old lady named Catalina. I looked for warts on her nose but didn't see any . She looked really excited to see us, anxious to try some hocus pocus on us I assume. Dinh asked her if she could do a cleanse. She shook her head "yes" and tried to pull him into the back of her shop, a black abyss which I imagined pigs feet and goat's ear to be hanging. Or a huge bubbling pot that she stirs as she cackles to herself. 
I grabbed Dinh's arm before he was abducted. "Wait, what is she going to do? How much does it cost?" I interrogated. 
"She said it cost 150 pesos.", Dinh explained. That's about 11 dollars. I got weirded out when she started having Dinh smell all her funny potions. 

"We should go. Yea, let's go Dinh" I pleaded. 
We skiddadled. But before we bailed, we snapped a pic with her cute mom. 

As we shuffled back to our hotel, a million thoughts zipped through my head. I was overwhelmed. I couldn't handle all this alternative medicine witch doctor thing. I'll admit, I was a little scared. I didn't want to have any creepy spirits taking over my body and end up like that freaky girl with the swiveling head in that one movie. I don't have time for all that nonsense. 
"What are you so afraid of?", I debated with myself. "You had all kinds of crazy things done to you in India, China and Korea. All in the name of medicine." 
I'm totally into learning about medicine in other countries. I just needed a day to let all this curandera stuff sink in.
The next day , my curiosity got the best of me. "Let's go back, Dinh. I want her to do the cleanse on me." I bravely announced.
So off we went, in the rain, to the witch doctor. It was a Sunday, so we weren't sure if she'd be open, but when we got there she was just as excited as the day before to see us. 
I told her I wanted the cleanse done and she hustled me back to the cramped space behind her shop.
Come here, my pretty....
First, she started rubbing my entire body with a raw egg. My hair, my arms, legs, chest, and even my eyes. All I could think of was how there better not be any poop on that egg. 
After that, she poured a mystery liquid that smelled like vodka onto the egg and then rubbed it on me a little more. She had me blow on it 3 times, then cracked it in a glass and said everything looked good but mumbled something in Spanish about my eyes. I didn't understand her. But it's fine. My eyes are still working great.
Next up, she took a rose leaf bouquet and fluffed it all over my body . Then she told me to stomp on it 3 times. I did as I was told. I didn't want to end up in her witch soup.
Lastly, she made me some hot chocolate. Sweet! 
She also gave me 2 roses to put by my bedside while I slept. To ward off the bad spirits, you know. But we ended up giving them to a lovey dovey couple on the street on our walk back home. Oopsie.
I'm not sure if my energy is "cleansed" like she claims. I'm just happy she didn't cast some kind of bizarre spell on me. That I know of..............
Bwahahahaha!!!!
Here's the evidence: